Hello Jinxy,

I would have to say that I identify with you on this principle in an interesting way. It is not the fact that you are a Cuckoldress that brings you into ridicule it is the fact that you do not fit into the box, context or norm that others can cope with.

My career and life have been defined by the fact that I am not afraid to try new things and challenge convention, beliefs, customs and rules. In my professional life I am highly regarded as a change agent. I don’t fit the mold and many people are vehemently threatened by anything that does not fit into the structure of their world.

I remember as a boy I found an insect in my Grandfathers home in North Carolina. It was freakish large and looked like a giant house fly. I thought it was a toy but when I tried to pick it up the wings flapped. I went and found my Grandfather to come see this thing. He told me it was a locust and my reaction was we needed to kill it. I thought he was going to do just that when he returned with a fly swatter, but to my surprise he coaxed the bug onto the swatter and then carried it outside and let it loose.

Just because it had no place in my world of experience didn’t mean it needed to be killed. This was a great lesson to my young mind.

Later in life as I worked to save a company there were many people who were threatened by me and sought to have me removed from the company due to their unwillingness to change and due to the fact that they felt I was working outside the scope of my job description.

A wise executive saw the problem correctly and created a completely new position and title for me. One that had never existed at the company. By giving me a label that had no definition the community stopped working against me and started to try to understand how they were suppose to respond to and support me in the organization. It was like magic.

You have a new name “Cuckoldress” that is a title that doesn’t even show up in my spell checker. People think it is based on kink, debauchery or depravity but I think it is not. I think the situation is much deeper and more significant than that. The sex is a benefit that you want and enjoy. Your husband also enjoys the fact that you have a full and happy sex life but what is more interesting is that no one would even care or would applaud your liberated lifestyle except for the fact that you are married.

Being married has many long seated traditions or a very well formed box of expectations. Your behavior goes beyond this significantly. My belief is that this chastisement is only based on how you break with their ideas of marriage.

It is my belief that becoming a Cuckoldress does not happen with the act of having sex with another man. It happens when you take a lead role in the relationship. When the woman decides to be in control of her own fulfillment on any level within the marriage. Just as your husband became your Cuck when he submitted to supporting you in your happiness. Finding the balance between two people is the essence of marriage and paring.

People fit together in different ways (not just sexually). They fill different needs in each other and that is the basis for a relationship. If the fit is strong then the areas that are weak are balanced or compensated for by our partner. Since every Man/Woman is different every bonding is different.

What I like about what I am reading is the sense of empowerment I get from your writing. You referred to it as power, while I am sure there is an element of power that is thrilling, empowerment is the concept I want to address. You, in this case especially, are not a victim.

I see too many women, beautiful young and happy when they get married and then after years of marriage having children they look like they have been run over by a truck. I don’t mean physically, although that is many times also the case. They look as if their lives have settled into a rut of expectation and duty not a live of discovery, excitement and adventure.

I know not everyone is up for adventure but the point is a woman should feel like she has the right to adventure as much as the next person and she should feel like she has the power to act on it. Even if she doesn’t. I have tried to convince my wife that she has choices in this life. That anything that makes her happy I would support her in and that is where I am a Cuck at heart. If she really needed to date men that would be ok. I trust her and I want her to be happy. I do not own her or control her except where she submits to societies expectations. Likewise I do not expect she will sleep with other men. If I am truly her Cuck then I need to accept her judgement in her right to choose what makes her happy, what she wants and what she needs.

So I am her Cuck because I am committed to be so and once I realized that it was for her pleasure not mine that is when things started to change. My wife told me that she didn’t know how to take charge because she thought I was criticizing her efforts when I discussed my fantasies. That was when I realized that I was toping from the bottom and was not really being her Cuck. When I let her be at the helm and truly submit to her will then is when she started to feel like she was in change and had control over her own situation and started to be what I wanted her to be. Empowered, in control, willing to express her wants and desires and to ask for and expect they would be fulfilled.

I mean I’ve talked to people online and in person who’ve asked me the point of the whole thing. Why not go and divorce your spouse and find someone else to spend time with? I mean you obviously don’t enjoy physically being with the person so why not go marry someone one else.

I’ve even found myself asking myself the same question whenever people bring that up. Mainly because they have a solid valid point. Yet I also realize that its more complicated than simply denying your husband, it goes to controlling your partner.

Also the denial is a turn on and can lead the couple to test their marriage in ways that go far beyond the norm or typical understanding of a relationship. However I think most people feel that this isn’t healthy and can ultimately lead to destruction in a relationship.

To say the least if I was never allowed inside my ‘wife’ as it may be I think i would actually want a divorce. I wouldn’t stay with someone that didn’t want to be physically intimate with me. However on a fantasy perspective as far as being denied a month or months or so, I would probably be willing to do. Forever I wouldn’t. I guess even I have my limits.

Now the way this relates is that my wife has told him that I’m ok with it, and he has nothing to worry about. But he is a bit puzzled. He automatically thinks “Is this guy setting his wife up somehow?” or other similar questions.

It is very hard to convince him that I am obedient to my wife in every way, even something so extreme like this. But I will soon talk to him and try to reassure him that we as cuckolds are a different breed, but he need not be alarmed.

You make me horny and uncomfortable, which is to say you are perfect as you are.

Best,

scott
Mrs. Kelly’s Playhouse

I think also that people simply don’t understand it like S&M, pantyhose fetish, etc it all seems weird to them. They fear it also because it threatens their world. They think that you don’t love your spouse and like to hurt him for example which is simply untrue at least in my opinion.

I watched your video with you and your spouse and found that you actually genuinely care and love your husband and he does you. I guess outsiders simply had a hard time understanding why you don’t simply leave him and go and do this whole thing without him. My answer has always been because they simply fail to understand that most likely it wouldn’t be the same and it would fizzle out without your partner.

Also sex is a lot more than just a physical thing for some people like a cuckold for example its the mental stimulation that fulfills them and the physical simply isn’t enough. Anyway I hope this makes sense… Keep doing what you do and forget those short sided idiots.